by Li-Lan Hsiang Weiss L.Ac.
Past blog posts have focused on the Chinese Five Phases, self care tools, integrative approach to pain…and the underlying message of all of these resources is the capacity, complexity, and creativity of the human experience. The healing process must be a creative process if it’s meant to address the nuances of each person. I came to this realization several years ago as I reflected on my personal journey of self care and self learning through Chinese and Maya medicine and my connection to the sacred. I tell folks, it’s a beautiful AND intense process.
I also saw these cycles in clients over the years, those who delved deeper into their own self, those who managed bit by bit due to circumstances of life and age, those who constantly came upon personal blockages that felt like set backs but really weren’t in the larger scheme, those who just weren’t interested in personal growth and were happy to have us give them some respite from their pain, and at some point later came back wanting to focus on healing another layer of their soul. Everything is a cycle along a spiral web…
Soul work and personal growth requires patience, diligence, love, humility, and humor. My husband, who is a musician, likes to say “Health through creativity, Creativity for Health”.
So through creativity, I have woven several aspects of my learning, embodiment, and Heart connection process into writing poetry that just started to flow through me as of the New Moon in April. Here is the first one I’m making public, which I feel ties into how the material of Tones for your Bones, the Chinese Five Element embodiment workshop, the understanding of cycles, honoring our emotions, and reverence to Nature can become a natural part of the healing process. It is part poetry, part prose. Other poems added below.
To the River Goddess (written on the 4th week of my moon cycle, the Enchantress week)
At the rock where the River Goddess speaks,
by the tulip poplar that grows between stone and water,
with the setting sun and aloeswood incense,
my salty tears mingle with your sweet flow.
Of what I cry I do not yet know,
It is not sadness, nor anger, nor longing.
Maybe it is the sacredness of place
My hands and feet meet Your coolness and yin,
And the clearing begins as I listen,
“You will be allright,” the rapids speak,
“I have greater things in store for you.
You have entered the turbulence of My rapids the past two days,
but look at Me before and after,
I am gentle and quiet.
Learn what I have to teach you, flow over these rocks.”
Tears of understanding trickle down to meet You.
My heart begins to lighten when I didn’t know it felt heavy.
I remember how You have taught me to merge with you,
Seeing You deeply in your ever changing flow,
Hearing Your music drown out my thoughts of worry,
Feeling my arms and hands be as fluid as You are.
I merge with you Goddess so You can teach me more.
A stronger wave of emotion arises as I allow the spontaneous to surface,
as I consciously let go of self imposed resistance,
as that is the path to the True Heart.
As the tears flow, I understand it’s the mind that clings, out of fear.
I continue to have You wash me,
and polish the protective armouring of my Pericardium,
So that my True Heart doesn’t have to “bear the unbearable”.
“I will be allright”
You lighten me River Goddess by bringing three white men in their donut tubes holding beer and water. I chuckle at the look of nervousness of the first as he anticipates your rapids and you swirl him around and down. The second one is not as anxious as he sees you didn’t capsize his friend. The third one totally relaxes as you gently carry him over the rocks.
I know You brought this lightness at this moment to lift the clouds over my heart. In gratitude, I wash my face, sipping your sweetness and chuckle as I continuously blow my nose to expel the congested emotions that “mist the mind”. I giggle as I imagine you carrying my snot down river to catch up with the three men gently caressing you.
In one last ceremony of connection, I smile with joy as I splash You over me nine times, in gratitude to Rosita Arvigo who taught me Maya medicine, the medicine of the land that raised me. Your rainbow droplets extinguish my aloeswood incense, perfect!
I stand to greet the setting Fire in the Sky,
To honor Earth, Metal, and Water at my feet,
To embrace Wood & Wind that surrounds me in the vibrancy of early summer.
I honor Self with Tree Receives Buddha Light
As I lift strong arms and bring down the energy of the Sun;
and I bow in gratitude to the unmeasurable support that Nature provides.
7/21/21 (written in five minutes after a morning of being submerged in the river current, on the week of Arthur “Link” Freeman’s Elemental Playshop Water week, on full moon in Aquarius week, with a friend doing her own mikvah immersion before her wedding). Another blog post on what True Yin means is forthcoming…but the teachings are still being integrated…
The River Goddess Speaks:
“Harness the power of the ever constant current
Allow it to pummel and cleanse deeply
every cell of your wounded heart.
A twist of longing and loneliness creeps in
It’s the longing to share the beauty of Nature with another.
It’s the longing of sharing this deep intimacy of merging with the River with another.
But a louder voice speaks up,
“You are not alone”
“Who are you?” I ask.
“The Goddess, the true Yin.
You are not alone because I am with you,
I am in you, I am you.
The True Yin is self-sustaining,
remember this whether you are born male or female.
The True Yin is always self-sustaining.”